Today we watched a video clip For writing and this is my writing.
One night Grandad took me fishing.Then he felt a pull then he pulled the moon then Grandad told me to hook the yellow moon when I hooked the moon and yellow stars came out then Grandad told me to came back.I came back with a star then we went home to sell the star then Grandad said it is Xmas they put the star on top of the Xmas tree and they did it every Xmas.
To Aaron
ReplyDeleteI liked how you described what colour the moon was. Just so you know Xmas is not a describing word.
From Courtney
Hi Aaron
ReplyDeleteGood work
Next time you could change the word said to a better word like replied or shouted.
From Rebecca